so yeah about those food critics that i mentioned in the last post. my next blogging idea is to start a bog called "food critic for ghetto dummies". here in shanghai, theres a few expat magazines that (imo) get really REALLY carried away in their restaurant reviews. half the problem is that some of the reviews are submitted by readers, so i think they try to write impressive reviews so that they will get published. so in this post, i will write an example of an over-the-top food review, then i will provide what a food review from the "food critic for ghetto dummies" blog would look like.
them: tucked away in an old, tree-lined french concession lane, restaurant X was a pleasure to enjoy. the interiors were magnificent. the wooden floors were made from old pirate ships that were salvaged from the mythical city of atlantis. the tables are zero carbon and the silverware melted down from qing dynasty iron pots. the romantic ambience was aided by soft green-friendly, locally-sourced lighting. the servers were friendly and spoke 65 different languages, and their clothes were made from cage-free unicorn fur. i ordered the chops de pork. it was served with a luscious mushroom cream sauce, which i paired with a wonderful vintage wine from the 1600s. i also ordered a plate of sauteed to perfection free-range, organic, free-trade, and of course zero carbon bread. the LEED Platinum certified bathroom had a delectable design of porcelain, ceramic, and stainless steel. and blah blah blah
food critic for ghetto dummies: food was good. good value. would come back.
basically, the food critic for ghetto dummies blog would answer three basic questions.
- was the food good?
- was the restaurant a good value?
- would you come back?
boom. done.
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